Girly Man

Know how my You Tube posts are usually a. random and b. pointless, here is another one.

Remember how Michael Jackson's Thriller was like the video of the century?
Apparently there is another one. From India.
And some precious Jackass even did the phonetic subtitles for the benefit of us English speakers. Sooo worth the download. If some reason you can't see it here, just search the keywords "Indian Thriller Subtitles" on YouTube. Speakers compulsary!

Calves of steel

My mom lives alone. Hence she does not really have many people to talk to most times. That is why that now that she is here in KL for the weekend, she is like a stand-up but on speed.

Sure it is a good thing. But so is breathing. Plus Mom is champion of long distance shopping and together with my dad, they can traverse the entire length of OneUtama a few times in a single day. So couple marathon narration with cross-country training and what do you get? Two pooped kids.

The current boyfriend has given up on us and politely excuses himself from the adventures we have but we biological offspring don't have a whisper of a chance to escape. I have tried introducing to them the lure of nature and culture (Stonehenge and Stratford-upon-Avon, no less). The attempt was treated with civilized tolerance but after a few stifled yawns on a park bench, I got the hint and parked them in a mall. Sigh.

Looks like it will be the same this time round.
Heels, make way for sneakers, for tis gonna be a long long walk.

Are you really suprised?

I am totally shocked and embarrassed by the attitude of some Malaysians.

My friend R was involved in a near-fatal hit and run. He sustained heavy injuries which included multiple fractures all over his body. His car fell off a highway ramp and the driver who hit his car sped off without even calling for help! In between slipping in and out of consciousness R had to call his friend on his own mobile for help and get this, the fire department only came after 45 minutes and after they cut open the car to remove the poor bloke, bystanders were robbing him as he lay on the ground!

The few firefighters were controlling the crowd and it was not until the medics came that they managed to create a ring around him to keep the crowd away. R had to use his broken arm to protect his wallet and the chain around his neck until his friends came to the scene. He lost his phone and watch. It is just so disgusting how people are.

Apparently this is a common thing. I was told that whenever there is an accident, the tow truck drivers would rob the cars before providing help to the victims. So there you go. Sick innit?

Pendidikan Moral

And so the passage into the treacherous 30s is upon me.

I have yet to have own a vintage Lanvin, I am still in Hush Puppies and I still don't have a pad to call my own. 'Tis a shame really. Nevertheless late bloomers last the longest. I hope.

It took me a long time indeed to find myself and I am still not too sure I have the correct answer. Perhaps maturity is the quiet acknowledgement that the point of existence is not to discover but instead to create oneself, and the acceptance of doing the best one can in any given situation. Sounds like hard work and for me, it is.

Over the weekend I just found out how a good friend of mine came within inches of certain death. The experience totally changed his life. Life life to the fullest he says. There is no time left for embarrassments, regrets or procrastination. Which is why he now drives a Mercedes I suppose.

Sloth is something of a best friend of mine. Fear comes in a close second. Ok, they are habits that need to be shoved out my 15th storey window but try hacking off your own arm. I mean, easier said that done no?

I take risks as easily as I take arsenic so let's just say I am as uptight and edgy as the next turkey in line for Thanksgiving dinner. So having my well meaning friends come tell me to loosen up is kinda funny.

I have been super lucky in that while I have been born with this cloud of gloom and doom, I have always had good people around me who have dragged me out of quagmires. And they are worth a million Marc Jacobs. Blessings indeed. Best present a girl can ask for.

No shows

I went to a pot luck party over the weekend to celebrate a friend's birthday and out of the 13 office mates invited, only me and another girl showed up.

Sure he was disappointed and I felt so bad for the birthday boy. So we had a party with just the three of us. If I was in his shoes, I would have been pissed off. I mean everyone had the opportunity to decline when invited but cancelling at the last minute is just so sad.

That settles it. For my wedding, it will be only family and close friends.

Look of Lurve

I have two friends (absolutely sweethearts) who being former airline crew, are very concerned with beauty and all its manifestations. It was their bed and butter, this looking prim and proper, and they are as polished as glass.

Then suddenly into their live I tumbled and I am pet project number one.

Of course I do not begrudge them. How could I possibly? Yet I did snap at one of them off the other day to stop talking about my appearance every time we meet. I felt so guilty afterwards that I ended up buying a can of hair spray. Talk about being a wimp.

I have mixed feeling about this. Being prouder of being called a geek than a girly girl, I find all this fussing so alien. While I hope I don’t give people the impression that my fashion sense is circa 1883, I seriously don’t give a hoot if I am a Summer or a Winter (which is crucial in determining your colour palette, by the way).

Looks like I am not going to land myself a millionaire playboy anytime soon.

Yet in this day and age, looks do matter. Now THAT I can begrudge. And I can begrudge till the cows come home and the pigs take flight but that there is a fact of life. The hunchback of Notre Dame will never win product endorsements and Angelina Jolie will never be without a job.

Women, we are strange creatures, no? We protect our young with the purest and the best and then slather on potentially carcinogenic war paint to face the world. The drugs we take and mutilations we endure. If I was not a woman myself, I would call us stupid to the point of being insane. Men have known this since time immemorial. Real men don’t wear eye shadow. Nor have tummy tucks.

Due to medical reasons I removed my trademark mole on my upper lip on Friday. This decision had taken me years to make. I can still recall the smell of burning flesh as the laser pierced my skin. I didn’t think I could unclench my toes again. And now I am walking around with what looks like a splat of ketchup on my face. I am told that it will heal. Oh well. This feeling of not giving a toss to what people say, is certainly liberating.

Poison - taken after meals

I am very disturbed with the practice of some our doctors here.

I have some issues with my skin, and twice I have been prescribed isotretinoin by dermatologists. So a fly can’t ice skate over my skin without falling a few times, ok fine, but I don’t think I have cystic/nodular acne severe enough to justify the use of the drug.

Isotretinoin is a last resort medication and in the US prescribed under the strictest control to cure the most severe form of acne. It is very powerful drug that would cause severe deformities in babies carried in the womb.

In the States women on the drug are recommended to take TWO types of birth control to ensure there is no risk of pregnancy. It can also cause depression, thoughts of suicide and psychosis, including increased pressure in the brain that can lead to permanent lost of eyesight, loss of hearing and even death. I am not kidding. These facts were taken from the US FDA.

The drug is so lethal that in the States there is a risk management plan for patients taking this drug and women must take two pregnancy tests before going on the drug, a negative pregnancy test before their medication refill and they must sign a legal document to say that they understand the risks of taking this drug.

Not so in KL. Both time I was prescribed, I was not told the name of the drug and not even the possible side effects. Only to not get pregnant and to collect the capsules on the way out, like it was aspirin or something.

You can imagine my shock when I did my research. I like to get depressed all on my own thank you very much without drugs to do the job for me. It is very irresponsible for doctors to prescribe isotretinoin without telling patients the full extent of the side-effects. The drug is costly at RM200 for a month’s supply and I suppose it is good income for them. And my boyfriend wonders why I don’t trust anybody.

Marketing at a new level

I am getting increasingly bothered by this not so new trend of calling sales persons Marketing Evangelists. Besides being ridiculous to the point of being corny, how can you actually take marketing Evangelists seriously.

My last encounter with an Evangelist (in the truest sense of the word here) was as memorable as choking on a bowling ball. Years ago I was walking through a nice public square, minding my own business when this Korean bloke came up and without even an introduction demanded to know if I was a Christian. Upon hearing that I am but a dirty heathen, quizzed me with amazement as to why don't I care what happens to me when I die. As my grandmother would say, CHOY! Talk about having a magnetic personality. Then he started following me around. All thoughts of enjoying the sunshine evaporated and I barely escaped with my pagan faith intact.

That experience stayed with me a long time and while peoples of different faiths have tried to save my soul, (perhaps because my aura is as bright as soot), my defences are on perpetual red alert. I mean, not everyone likes being told within 5 minutes of being introduced, that they will end up toast on judgement day should they not convert to the 'right' religion.

I guess if I had a chance to talk to that Korean bloke again, I would have some hard questions for him but sometimes I find that some people get emotional when their faith is questioned or criticised. Well I am after all in Malaysia where it is all the more taboo as interfaith dialogue is perceived as detrimental to national security as a rabbi setting up a synagogue in Kampung Pandan.

Anyway back to the topic, if companies actually think that I am going to warm up to their marketing Evangelists, they have got another thing coming! Anyone knows where I can get a taser in KL?

A love hate relationship

I will be getting a MacBook. Alright, it will belong to my department but nevertheless woo hoo!
New toy! New toy! Oh yeah!

My department seems to do more presentations than MGM studios and seeing that our art director/gastro enterologist will be returning to Vienna in 2 weeks, looks like we will be expected to whip up mountains of brilliant creativity to justify the purchase of this instrument of our doom.

So it is will be more work but I am hoping that with the MacBook, it will also be play, at least until the novelty wears off.