Fretting on Friday

So I woke up the wrong side of the bed today. The old familiar feeling of gloom and doom is all pervading. I was even picking fault with my nasi lemak this morning. Being a woman gives me the right to blame it on my hormones. It also gives me the right of blaming my boyfriend for the woes of my sad existence. Neat.

Hard to believe I know, but I have been a loner most of my life with a tiny bastion of good friends. I never thought I would hook up with a bloke with an even tinier bastion of good friends. We understand full well the happiness of solitude. Being a lonely island among men has it privileges, such as NOT being constantly invited to 'catch up' only to face a sales pitch on insurance or network marketing. I hate that ruse, don't you?

Nevertheless somewhere along the line I warmed up to the idea of not dying alone. Fancy that.

So while I am trying to break free from my social lethargy, the Significant Other is happy as he is. So I tell him that I want to see other people. Hm, that doesn't sound quite right, but you get my point. Of course what I meant was, I want HIM to share my goal too. You can just sense the disaster looming here, can't you?

My mature 30 year old mind tells that couples don't need to do EVERYTHING together. So when he politely declines to accompany me on family trips and social soirees, I call him an anti-social prat and sulk for days.

After the rage evaporates (for it to erupt another time, naturally) and apologies grudgingly made, clinical analysis of the situation reveals that I am a victim of my upbringing more that I thought.

Oh I don't know. Maybe it's my nesting instincts kicking in. Maybe it's my disillusion of living in KL. Maybe it's finding nobody to invite for my future wedding dinner. Gawd knows.

Running the risk of getting all misty eyed on nostalgia, I nurture rose-tinted recollections of a small town lifestyle where the pace is far from frantic and people still know their neighbours' kids by name.

When I grow old I want to be like one of those uncles and aunties who breakfast with their posse after their line dancing or morning jogs. Not that I am a fan of stepping in tune to Deep in The Heart of Texas everyday at dawn, mind you. Be it tennis, tai chi whatever - it's the conviviality and gossip that is so charming. Now that I think of it, the senior citizen social scene in my hometown is far more happening than the Boy Scouts.

I never knew my parents to be social butterflies. (Can't blame them seeing that they were raising two semi-Goth wannabes.) So much so, that when retirement rolled by and we kids flew the coop, the parents found themselves a little bored and hence took to fighting each other for variety. My mom at least is trying to resuscitate her social circle and moving to a new neighbourhood has helped. Call me fuddy-duddy but I find old ladies laughing and gossiping - oh so cute!

Being self-centred, naturally I wonder how my life will be in 30-40 years. I should hate to spend my golden years confined to the TV room watching Desperate Housewife reruns with my 14 cats. I sure hope the coffee shops and public parks will still survive. I am not willing to give them up yet. Perhaps the kopi-o would be replaced by the skinny latte. Line-dancing may have to make way for morning salsa. Fine.
Que sera sera.

At the very least, I just hope that when I ease into my delicate 60s, I will still have equally minded bosom buddies to be cute with.

Bile

Being cooped up with broadband is cool.
Being cooped up with a connection speed that predates 1997 (when dial-up ruled Malaysian soil) is, in a nutshell, FREAKING AGONY.

That naturally speaks volumes of how much I, and I would guess pretty much the rest of the nation have totally taken broadband for granted. Even with Telekom using back-up channels, speeds are nowhere near normal.

And on the subject of contingency plans or rather the lack there of, I wonder if we are really capable of coping when oil runs out, or clean water for that matter. I guess the last petrol increase scared enough people out of their wits to consider alternatives.

It’s not rocket science. We know that oil will run out. And so will clean water. And that the ice caps will melt and wipe out a kazillion people.

While they make great fodder for any General Paper/English essay, you would think that surely there is somebody out there looking out for us. All those science experts and the UN, and there’s NASA and of course, the world governments, surely SOMEONE has a plan.

Having spoken with some people who have worked/is working for the UN, sadly most of the time altruism gives way to bureaucracy. Regional contingency plans can’t even be seamlessly integrated due to governments unwilling to share information and what more resources. I guess it is only human to be most generous after a catastrophe. I can’t stand it when you can’t see the good for the red tape. Perhaps it is a good thing the UN binned my job application. I don't think I can handle the politiking.

Which brings me back to the question, is there anyone looking out for the rest of us?

I am a cynic. You know my thoughts already.

OMG, OMG I am actually able to post something. Since the earthquake that almost flattened Taiwan also wiped out the underwater telecommunications cables servicing a good part of South East Asia, my connection has been reduced to a crawl. I was supposed to give you a surprise but at this speed, all efforts to post anything online has been up to naught.
So have patience and the unveiling with happen at some point.

Yappy Mew Dear and may 2007 be a fun ride.

Blessed Christmas everyone

Book 'em, Officer

Having so much time on my hands, I have not once felt bored. To say that I have been catching up on my reading is an understatement.

Let's see, I have devoured books on dragons, time travel, space travel, death, new life and new civilizations, women in the pursuit of happiness, men in the pursuit of happiness, magic and sweet sour pork. And I still have 4 more books on dragons, death and more men in pursuit of happiness (gay adventures in other words). It is a blessing indeed to have the loves of your live with you and the time to savour each delectable morsel. Time that is running short nevertheless.

I have made MPH and Kinokuniya my publishing holy land and I raided the Pay Less Books and Reader's Corner like a Saracen possessed. I also snap at the boyfriend whenever he raises frivilous suggestions like leaving the flat for food and fresh air.

I am such a nerd. But you know, that is ok. Speaking of which there was this teenager who angrily wrote to The Star newspapers 2 weeks ago to vent about being called a nerd. According to her letter, she studies hard and as a result the kid gets labelled as a nerd in school. She wrote with such fury that you wound think that the name would get her stoned to death.
Me, I embrace my kind. Geeks turn me on. 'Nuff said.

Scissors in the City

Today I lopped off 3 inches of my tresses.

I have sworn off those posh hair salons after Kool Kuts in Bangsar Village actually charged me RM70 for a wash which totally drenched my collar and a trim that nobody noticed.
I felt so ripped off.

Then I had the misfortune of going to La Bell on Jalan Telawi where the shampoo girl almost ripped by scalp off and the stylists ganged up on me to tell me how I was starting to bald.. and oh what luck, she had just the solution. For just under RM400 I could delay my moulting and save my crowning glory. Of course when I sought a second opinion from the Loreal Paris concept store the stylist rolled his eyes when I asked if I had a bald spot.

So today I got my haircut at QQ CUT at Mid Valley for RM12 for 12 minutes. So I don't look like Jennifer Aniston but I see nothing wrong in looking like a handsome sheepdog with my shag.

The Complete Blackadder

I got myself a Blackadder DVD boxset and I am such a happy camper. Sarcasm and insults take on a whole new level when one is dealing with Edmund Blackadder. I have been coveting this for as long as I can remember. The collection traces the exploits of Blackadder in 5 generations. It is basically the same cast featured in different periods settings.

I think that English comedy with the likes of Blackadder is so successful because the writers were given the task of entertaining their audience who do not take too kindly to having their intelligence insulted with excessive slapstick and rude humour.

Hence I was surprised to find it in Low Yat.

Of course Rowan Atkinson is brilliant as Edmund. There is something terminally sexy about a scowling man in a full court dress. And then there's Tony Robinson who played Baldrick, Edmund's whipping boy. He managed to look like a peasant in all the 4 series. I don't think I could recognise him clean. It was mostly to Baldrick that most of Edmund's venomous insults were spewed at. The series comes highly recomended and once K gets his DVD burner, I am backing up this baby for posterity!

I sign off with this snippet. Its much funnier on screen sadly.

Melchett : Unhappily Blackadder, the Lord High Executioner is dead.
Blackadder : Oh woe! Murdered of course.
Melchett : No, oddly enough no. They usually are but this one just got careless one night and signed his name on the wrong dotted line. They came for him while he slept.

Why do you want to work here?

Today I went for an interview for a PR position in a big college.
Upon my post-interview dissection I cringed a million cringes thinking over some of the answers I had to make up on the spot.

I was asked about my flaws. You mean besides the fact that I am as blunt as a rock and as confident as a sloth? I feel like such a floozy overcompensating for my lack of experience, lack of panache and lack of control over my mouth. I was experiencing verbal diarrhoea in hyberdrive. Yeah, reeeeall smooth.

If my ancestors were looking over my shoulders, they would have hid their faces in brown paper bags.

You live and learn, they say. From this experience I have learn that I need to down a couple of shots of vodka before I attend any interviews.

Sorry state of updating

I have been horrible at updating this blog but I am working on another project right now that is taking a bit of time to finish. Will let you know more once I deem it presentable.

So tell me about yourself

I am one of those people who suffer an addiction to procrastination. I will postpone everything until it cannot be postponed anymore, then spurred by guilt or a nagging boyfriend/mother/Citibank customer service, I set off on a excruciating quest to complete EVERYTHING in one day.

I am one of those people who procrastinate doing the big things that need to be done by busying myself with all the small things that get in the way. This time my procrastination is a little more dire. I have so far been postponing my life and getting a move on my career simply because I am obsessed with doing everything else.

How can I possibly choose what I want to do with the rest of my life when nothing has fallen into place, my life does not makes sense, my hobbies not pursued, my kitchen not scrubbed and my laundry is not done? Oh the pressure.

And oh I have had a million things to do. My parents were around, my legal papers are still in disarray, my home looks like a barn and I need to lose weight.
How can I possibly be ready for the job market? The time is not ripe, my mind is not prepared, people still have not mistaken my silhouette for Heidi Klum’s, the stars are not aligned and I have nothing to wear.

See my problem?

Perhaps that is why I slightly resent the job interview I have tomorrow. I am not ready for the big bad world yet.