Perennial questions

I think I must be the most clueless person in the world. I once described myself as a tumbleweed. Many years since then, I am still a tumbleweed. I thought I would have figured it by now. You know. Life.

Most people have, well according what they have been posting on Facebook anyway. Career and offspring feature prominently.

I came across a youtube video of a crying girl asking her teacher why wasn't she not born like everyone else with hearing. Her teacher simply asked her, why be like everyone else.

 

I guess that is in essence what this conversation is about. How we define happiness and does it fit in with everybody else's. Some say its service to others. Some say its sacrifice for family. Some say one should only live for one's self.

 

In the end I would say, in all honestly, that I want to matter.

For my life to have meaning beyond being just a face in the crowd, sized up by salesmen if I am worth their sales pitch or by cashiers if I am worth their smile.

 

Yet even what matters is so personal. In this world, money matters. Image matters. The superficiality matters as much as we want to deny it. My stints in marketing and communication reinforces this. And yet it feels shallow to want to matter to people who care for so little.

 

All round I hear how people are reduced to dollar values and the spirit counts for small change. The increasing number of feel good sites and forwarded inspiring stories fill the holes in our hearts because as a community we are running low on faith and hope. We all crave for good news.

How can someone with so little courage dream of making a difference. I guess I should try to start small.

I have the rest of my life to wing it. A tumbleweed looking to bring meaning and to actually matter. Sounds so crazy it may even work.