Wednesday, November 04, 2015

Caffeine withdrawal

The flights are booked. I am really excited to be on the road again. For a pedestrian, I have traveled far.  A privilege and blessing indeed. I don't know any more than bliss will be contained in a cup of freshly brewed coffee where the skies are blue. Here's hoping.

The universe sent me a message yesterday. I came in the form of a forwarded message containing a youtube link which under normal circumstances, I would  ignore. It was like God telling me to be my authentic self. And today, I tried to be. It is liberating if not somewhat foreign. I feel like I have a decision and commitment to make.

Oh authentic self. I guess I am going to get my hair coloured red again. And get that tat I have been thinking about.  Somehow or a rather, through the randomness that accompanies idle chatter with Sharon, we begun talking about soul mates.

Once upon a time, I used to believe in soul mates. These days I would put my money on finding a unicorn instead.  Advice that was given is to go slow and try finding mates first. Meeting people is hard. especially people I don't want to stab. At this rate being a crazy cat lady is starting to make a lot of sense.

Sometimes it still hurts. For Will to say that tis better to have love and lost, the bard knows nothing of rejection - when the knife enters, piercing flesh and marking bone, and the final twist of the blade which maims the heart, not to kill but cripple it forever.  I would have preferred to not have loved at all. 

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