Sunday, March 12, 2006

Just a minute

I have been monstrous.
Negative vibes have been emanating from this blog like putrid stench from a cheese factory.

So wrong I know, but so much to rant yet so few people picking up my phone calls. So I launch my troubles to the wide wide world in hope that it will finally give me peace.
All it did was reduce my regular audience of 5 bored people to 2. Misery is so unappreciated.

Well I have geared myself into self discovery mode again. You know the good ole

"what do i want to do with my life"
"do I want to be happy or be able to afford to eat"
"what is the purpose of my existance" and
"when will they invent a fat free peanut butter donut"

.. you know, life changing questions.

I guess what I really lack is the courage of taking chances, to say to heck with 6 years of education and just go ahead to sell flowers/bake bread/make balloon animals/be a wedding planner/start a business.

In that sense I admire my brother immensely (although I rather shoot myself than admit it to him as his head is the size of a barn already). He has appeared in a TV commercial, competed on TV, performed at gigs in Singapore, and lately just quit his job at the ad agency. He is true to himself and knows what he wants.

I have noticed that as his star rises, the awe that he used to have of his older sister is starting to fade too. And that is cool-not easy to swallow but its ok. My baby brother is growing up into a determined young man.

But back to my earlier conundrums, I do believe I am not alone and many people in my age group of the late 20s to early 30s, are in the same boat questioning their purpose and course. But blessed are we who have that luxury of choice.


redmed said...

It's been long time I last visited this blog. Well, a blog belongs to a lady with tons of questions in mind, never get her brain a break. Being 20 years old, just a many sophisticated thinkings which may be very simple to some ppl, like me! 'Success is a mind game', maybe keep thinking is the way to achievement. Anyway, it's very nice to hear from Gaya that she is still alive after long years of separation.

Though you can't be to my wedding ceremony, I will send you

redmed said...

I will send u tones of pic in order to flood ur account. Don't be jealous on me...hehe, as u will have ur turn later.