Sunday, August 06, 2006

Proffesion of choice: Housewife

Only 6 weeks and counting.

Honestly I am quite surprised that I have come so far. Survived rather.

There is nothing as agonizing as doing something that you unhappy doing. So my heartfelt respect and empathy goes to all the people out there who are stuck in shitty situations that they can’t get out of and yet soldier on everyday.

I am quite convinced that I will leave the profession, for the million reasons I won’t go into now. When I tell people, I get a litany of WHYs.

Why don’t I want to practice?
Why did I take law?
Why do I waste my time with chambering?
Why do I go on and on about my unhappiness and not do something about it?

A lot of people can’t understand my decision and quite a few have been vocal about their disapproval although my mates have been brilliant with their support, especially the young lawyers, ironically. Yet at times I feel like a quitter because I am giving up because it’s too hard.

That does not make me feel less guilty though especially towards my Mom and Dad. I am torn between finding happiness for myself which may just land me in the poor house OR alternatively traveling the tried and tested route to eventually earning enough to turn from being their dependant to their provider.

And it does so NOT help that I have not figured out what I want to do with my life. Sure, half of me wants to run off to be a UN field officer or another Irene Fernandez, but then I would also like to be able to spend time with my family, own a decent house and vacation in the Alps.

Too many people are selling their souls to their jobs and sadly this is viewed positively. A proud mother was telling me of her daughter who left her firm at 4 am only to return to the office again by 6 am.

There is a perverse pride associated with working to death.

But what is the point of working so hard so that you can afford the surgery to remove the ulcer you get from working too hard?

1 comment:

Perineum Speaks said...

Well, at least you're armed with the qualifications to do many other things; your crossroads are lined with many paths for you to step onto and explore, to proceed as far as you want to before you decide to take on another.

Choices are more open for you, you Scholar. You, one amongst the intelligentsia; who dwells in the academia. Its almost like you can choose your career path on your whims. You're hardly oblige to be nailed to one, and only one, career path. Unlike me, having no other skill then being a lowly designer, who ....

Oh let me not whine about MY fate now. this is not my blog