A few tips for a night out.
1. Eat more that a cheese frankfurther for dinner
2. Plan to have only ONE long island ice tea a night
3. Do NOT have another above-mentioned drink within a half hour of the other
4. A whisky right after is NOT a good idea
5. When your stomach starts having a mind of its own, it is probably a good idea to obey unconditionally
6. When the club fixtures seem to look more becoming than the men around you, it is time to leave
7. Always have a friend/boyfriend/maid at home to hold your hair back while you offer your stomach contents to the toilet bowl goddess
Man, I got plastered on Friday. I have disgraced my people.